I’m not really in the best mood right now, so this blog is very fitting. These are things that I have observed the past year in trend and beauty that I simply cannot stand. I’d love to know what you think! Hope it makes you laugh 🙂
Open Toe Booties
This shoe is an oxymoron. A boot with the toes cut out, really? Is this where fashion is heading these days? So, I can’t wear it in the winter because my toes will freeze and I can’t wear it in the summer because my feet will sweat. Good job, guys.
Colored Contacts on Brown Eyes
Being of brown eyes myself, I will admit I rocked some green-hazel contacts back in the day (I’m talking middle school. They were my mom’s and I would wear them to school with lots and lots of mascara and liquid liner. I looked like a psychotic cat) Was it a good idea? No. You could see my beautiful poop-brown color poking through every corner of those contacts, and it just looked stupid. It especially concerns me when I see people trying to pull off “violet” eyes. That’s not even a real color. If it’s for Halloween, fine. If it’s for every day, please, stick to clear contacts. Especially if you are of ethnic or Asian descent. You aren’t fooling anyone, we all know God gave you some brown ass eyes LOL Wear them proudly!
Big Girls in Skinny Jeans
Now, I’m not as big as these ladies here, but I AM curvy and I will not wear skinny jeans. You literally have to be a size 2 or below to pull these off. Please, for the love of God, do NOT wear skinny jeans unless you are an Olson twin or less than 100 lbs. Just don’t do it. Period.
The Hand-On-Hip Pose
It isn’t so much that the “hand-on-hip” pose is unattractive, but more that too many girls are doing it these days in photos. It just looks phony, or fake. We get it, you want your arm to look skinny. But trust me, no one cares what your arm looks like. I ESPECIALLY can’t stand when more than one person in a photo is posing this way. How stupid do the Kardashians look with 25 people in their Christmas photo doing the “Hand-on-hip”? Kill me now. I’ve already covered this on my Facebook page, but I thought it was worth bringing up again. My 2011 New Year’s Resolution is to never strike this pose myself again. Time for something new and original!
Web Cam Pics
Two words: NIGHT MARE. It really doesn’t matter who you are, you will always come out looking like a rapist or a serial killer in these web cam photos. In this day and age, where everyone’s cell phones have access to taking pictures and uploading on to your social networking sites, there is just no excuse. The lighting is always terrible and the quality is hidious. Death to the web cam photos!
Pale Girls with Too-Dark Hair
|Evan Rachel Wood
|Evan Rachel Wood
Here’s an example of actress Evan Rachel Wood (formerly Marilyn Manson’s girlfriend). She is absolutely stunning as a red head, which is closer to her natural color than that aweful charcoal black she is trying to rock in the bottom photo. Dark hair comes with a lot of maintenance if you are naturally lighter. You MUST darken your brows with pencil, gel, etc. You MUST wear a stronger blush, and possibly bronzer. You MUST bring out your eyes with liner (please, no violet contacts, haha!). If any of my pale sisters out there are vying to be gothic brunettes, you CAN do it, but your makeup and wardrobe has to completely change. The worst is when those little Emo girls do it, and have no idea how to fill in their blonde eyebrows or cover their mass of freckles. Oye.